Jealous

It sucks that I can see a picture and immediately get jealous. Not because of the people but simply because they are having fun and i feel like im left out. I dont want to be a responsible adult....

Tuesday

Tuesday, October 6th, is my court date with the man... no im sorry not a man, the thing, that donated his DNA to make my child to prove to him that he is, in fact, the father. The closer the date gets the more angry and nervous I become. Words that I will probably never say scream in my head. But I'm so afraid that one day this person that so adamantly denied the existance of my little boy will try to come into his life. If that does happen i will be a very angry woman, which it probably will. The worst part is, he probably thought he would get away with knocking me up without any consequences. Well, you piece of shit, I'm going to be in your life for the next 25 years, taking your money. Enjoy your car while you can. You pushed me past my breaking point. Which, quite frankly, is hard to do and I will make your life the hell it deserves without really having to do a damn thing. Whatever it was that I saw in you was an obvious illusion because you are slime! But as much as I despise your existence, I can't hate you completely because you gave me something that has brought me such joy. My son.